Breaking the Silence

Prayer. For most of my life that sound of that word would flood me with guilt and longing. Oh, I wanted to pray! I wanted to be called a woman of prayer. I read about it, I listened to teachings about it and I desired it so intensely and yet, I lacked.

There were moments when it was consistent. There were moments when I was headed in the right direction, but thats all it would be; moments.

From talking with others throughout the past few years I believe this describes many of our lives. We want, we try and yet we are still struggling through. I feel like prayer is often the thing in the christian life that many of us esteem but few have truly experienced the life changing pursuit of prayer. We want those around us to think it's a consistent part of our day and yet how often do we tell others we will pray for them and then the moment you move on from that conversations the promise is forgotten.

For my own life, there were a couple of main reasons why I esteemed and yet lacked.

The first would be plain old, ugly laziness. It's tough to admit, but prayer takes time, it takes commitment and that's something we just don't want to give. We want the results of prayer but aren't willing to give the time to prayer.

The second, is just a down right lack of faith. How often we find ourselves thinking "What if God doesn't do what I ask?" "What if He doesn't answer?" We don't want to doubt God and are scared that if we ask for things and they don't happen in our lives we will struggle even more to believe.

There are other struggles as well but those two, they are what caused the biggest wall in my prayer life or lack there of.

The fact is though that prayer is not simply us listing our needs to Jesus and hoping that if we use the right combination of words He will see fit to grant us our wish. Yes God delights to meet our needs and move mountains in our lives but He is far more personal than some distant star to wish upon.

The truth that really broke through the wall in my prayer life and changed things forever is this, God wants a relationship with me even more than I want one with Him. He is relational and oh, do I want that, but in order to have a relationship with someone you must communicate.

If a husband and wife don't communicate the relationship is gone. If you loose touch with a friend and don't talk for years there is a distance that doesn't disappear until you break the silence.

If we want a living, breathing, beautiful, lasting relationship with Jesus, the lover of our souls, we must pray!

Prayer isn't just us dryly listing our needs to a distant God. Prayer is sharing our heart, our deepest desires with a Jesus that listens to every word. He loves and honors those who give time to prayer. He wants to work in our lives and the lives of those around us even more than we want it and delights in daring requests. We don't have to be afraid that He won't answer, we need only to be diligent in asking. He honors persistence and those who trust that even when all odds seem against, He is able to save to the uttermost and He cherishes those who say "Thy will be done", trusting that our King sees far into the future and knows better than us what the perfect way is.

Prayer is worship. Prayer brings closeness. Prayer builds your relationship like nothing else.

Sure, at first it might feel like a chore. You may not even know how to pray, but simply start and our ever patient Father will teach you and if you are faithful and diligent it won't be long until you see that this is the secret to a beautiful relationship with Christ. Soon you will see why we are commanded to "pray without ceasing."


  1. This post is so honest. Thank you for sharing the words. I pray mostly when I feel the need to do it. I just can't do on a obligatory time. But I feel that every prayer helps.

    1. Yes, and it's so beautiful to see how Christ works in our hearts, that the more we spend time with Him the more we desire a close relationship with Him. Thank you for your encouragement, Melissa!

  2. These are deep reflections from the heart of a woman listening closely to God's voice. Thank you for sharing! I personally view prayer as the constant conversation we have with God as we go about our day. At times it's passionate, at times it's silent, but I think of it as ongoing, as if a companion was right by my side (because He is!).

    1. Thank you, Lacy! Love hearing your input! How true that is! It is so beautiful when we abide in that constant communication with our Jesus.